Talk:Hemochromatosis 2012

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Revision as of 09:17, 24 April 2012 by Staniewski (talk | contribs)

Feedback

I really like your wiki, I think it is clear and brief. Though, I have a couple of notes.

Formal

  • Maybe you should try starting less sentences with "Hereditary hemochromatosis ..." [Julia]
  • In Reference Sequence, I like that you highlighted the positions of known mutations in red. [Julia]
  • It might be helpful for the reader if you refer to the pictures at the proper place in the text. Especially for the figures "iron absorption pathway" and "HFE mutation effects". [Julia]

Content

  • Section Summary: Because the accumulation of iron is a slow process most patients show symptoms between the age of 30 to 60.

They appear for the first time at this age, don't they? It sounds as if they would only show until you are 60... In section Phenotype you write: Most patients begin to show symptoms between the age of 30 and 60. Maybe this wording is better.[Julia]