Difference between revisions of "Talk:Hemochromatosis 2012"
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== Feedback == |
== Feedback == |
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=== Formal === |
=== Formal === |
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| − | + | * Maybe you should try starting less sentences with "Hereditary hemochromatosis ..." [Julia] |
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| − | + | * In '''Reference Sequence''', I like that you highlighted the positions of known mutations in red. [Julia] |
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=== Content === |
=== Content === |
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| − | + | * Section '''Summary''': Though this site focuses on hereditary hemochromatosis (hemochromatosis type 1) it is worth noting, that there are differrent types of hemochromatosis. |
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Did you mean: |
Did you mean: |
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Though this site focuses on hereditary hemochromatosis (hemochromatosis type 1) it is worth '''mentioning''', that there are different types of hemochromatosis. |
Though this site focuses on hereditary hemochromatosis (hemochromatosis type 1) it is worth '''mentioning''', that there are different types of hemochromatosis. |
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| − | + | * Section '''Summary''': Because the accumulation of iron is a slow process most patients show symptoms between the age of 30 to 60. |
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| − | They appear for the first time at this age, don't they? It sounds as if they would only show until you are 60... |
+ | They appear for the first time at this age, don't they? It sounds as if they would only show until you are 60... In section '''Phenotype''' you write: |
| + | Most patients begin to show symptoms between the age of 30 and 60. |
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| + | Maybe this wording is better.[Julia] |
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Revision as of 13:41, 23 April 2012
Feedback
Formal
- Maybe you should try starting less sentences with "Hereditary hemochromatosis ..." [Julia]
- In Reference Sequence, I like that you highlighted the positions of known mutations in red. [Julia]
Content
- Section Summary: Though this site focuses on hereditary hemochromatosis (hemochromatosis type 1) it is worth noting, that there are differrent types of hemochromatosis.
Did you mean: Though this site focuses on hereditary hemochromatosis (hemochromatosis type 1) it is worth mentioning, that there are different types of hemochromatosis.
- Section Summary: Because the accumulation of iron is a slow process most patients show symptoms between the age of 30 to 60.
They appear for the first time at this age, don't they? It sounds as if they would only show until you are 60... In section Phenotype you write: Most patients begin to show symptoms between the age of 30 and 60. Maybe this wording is better.[Julia]
